Let's say that your parents always wanted you to succeed however they tried to motivate you to be better, to do better by finding fault with you and your actions. Your subconscious mind takes this in and then regulates your life according to this belief of being wrong.
Sadly, we hear negative feedback more often than positive affirmations. So it is no wonder our subconscious mind protects us by repressing these emotions, putting them somewhere safe so that we don't have to deal with them every minute of the day. Eventually, however they must be dealt with.
Then as an adult, you have a relationship with someone who gives you positive feedback all the time, who treats you the way you always wanted to be treated, who didn't find fault with what you were doing.
This relationship feels great for a while but because the Subconscious Mind always recreates the childhood environment it will start to be annoyed with your partner so that now you are in conflict.
Consciously you are enjoying the positive feedback and you start to feel both joy in that you like what your partner is doing but your subconscious mind believes you don't deserve this otherwise your parents would have praised you. So you feel fear because being praised doesn't match your childhood environment.
So because your subconscious mind must always be right and always wins you start to push your partner away.
And so your Subconscious Mind Recreates the Childhood Environment
Your family may have genuinely loved you but felt that if they pointed out your faults then you would be motivated to change them.
Unfortunately this erodes your self esteem and self confidence.
This means that when you accept loving behaviour from your partner you feel as if you don't deserve it and somehow it is dangerous to you.
On a subconscious level it is dangerous because it contradicts your belief that your parents think you are unworthy of love (because they always criticised you). It is dangerous because it triggers a subconscious repressed fear of being abandoned and below this fear of abandonment is the fear of death.
As you let go of this belief that you are unworthy of love by finding it in your body, breathing into it until it disappears or sending it out to the sun to be burnt up, you will let go of the fear of abandonment and the repressed fear of death and so will enter into a new phase of a loving relationship with your partner.
You will be able to see that your family found faults through a misguided beliefs = that you would be able to change those behaviours to be better.