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Living and Dying by Others' Expectations: Breaking Expectations for Self-Fulfillment

Sometimes a person is constantly ill but there is no logical or medical explanation for it.

Sometimes they are actually living their life according to someone else’s expectations and not living their own life at all!

Jason was a very irritable 74-year-old man who had suffered a stroke in the left-brain three years before he came to see me. He was paralyzed down the right side of his body; his right eye was turned outwards and he clenched his jaw all the time.

He was interested to see if my work with the subconscious mind could give him some insight into his stroke and the cause of it. He already knew the medical cause but could not see why he had had a stroke as he had always been an extremely fit and strong man.

Although it was awkward for Jason to come for a personal consultation when we could have done it over the phone or on Skype,Jason preferred the face-to-face contact.

Jason had worked extremely hard on his property but had dreams of a business he had been establishing in the background for the time when he could sell the farm and move into town.

His wife had always supported his dream and the idea of the move. She was in fact always enthusiastic about it and gave no indication that there was any doubt in her mind about it.

She thought it was a pipe dream not realising the power of the subconscious mind

However, as the time for the move approached she refused to move from the property. She said she didn’t think it was of such importance to him, although she admitted that he had spoken about the new business and what it would be like nearly every day for many years.

She thought it was a pipe dream and he would change his mind when the time came.

Jason became torn between his dream and his wife, finally convincing himself that “it probably wouldn’t have worked anyway” and so he stayed on the property.

Jason told me that he thought that to stay on the property any longer than he had to was like ‘a living death’ to him especially as he was getting older and would not be able to do the things required to make the land continue to prosper.

He could see the day when his age would stop him working efficiently and he did not want to see the land that he had put so many years, time and effort into building, start to deteriorate. He felt torn between his dream of leaving and his wife’s wishes to stay.

He stayed on the land. Then he had a stroke.

Breaking Expectations for Self-Fulfillment: His life became the ‘living death’ he had so feared.

As we worked on breaking expectations for self-fulfillment, you could see his eye return to its normal position, his jaw relaxed and by the time he had recognized and released all the internal stresses held in his subconscious mind all the lines on his forehead had disappeared.

He was also able to move his arm and hand, which he had not been able to do before our consultation. All in all, it was a very successful visit. Or so I thought!!

His wife, however was very shaken by this information. She felt threatened by the knowledge that he had given up his dream for her and admitted to feeling a great deal of guilt over it; not for him staying on the land when he did not want to but for having encouraged him to continue to dream of his new business when she herself knew she would never give up the property.

Honesty would have alleviated the despair

They had enough money to own a house in town as well as keep the property. However, they had seen it as an ‘either/or’ situation. Perhaps if Jason’s wife had been more honest with him from the beginning they may well have worked out a very suitable compromise that didn’t put Jason under such stress.

Both conscious and Subconscious planning

Jason and I released a lot of despair from his early years and particularly much resentment he had had from his fifties when he so wanted to leave the land but couldn’t. It was at that time that he had really started to build on his dream (his subconscious mind's plan for him) and planned the move – with what he thought was his wife’s blessing.

He had worked long and hard for years to provide well for his family and finally his dream of doing what he wanted to do was within reach.

He had it all planned out as to how he would go about the business and was really looking forward to it. Now, because of his stroke, he was not only unable to pursue his dream but also was unable to continue to work the land as he had before.

Jason wanted to return for another consultation to see if he could improve his physical ability some more. However, he was dependent on his wife to drive him to me and he did not keep his next appointment.

I often wondered what became of him: first he was not able to move to town to pursue the business he wanted to pursue and secondly he wanted to come back for more insight from me but as I found out later, his wife would not bring him.

Being of two minds...

If you have a dream it is because it is in your destiny, your soul's intent, to achieve it. When you don't follow your heart's desire then your conscious mind ( Jason staying on the land) and subconscious minds ( Jason wanting to fulfil his business dream) are in conflict. That is what 'being of two minds' is all about.

Click here to learn more about this conflict and how to resolve it.

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